These violent delights have violent ends

These violent delights have violent ends,

And in their triumph die, like fire and powder,

Which, as they kiss, consume: the sweetest honey

Is loathsome in his own deliciousness,

And in the taste confounds the appetite

I know what you're thinking, this guy knows his Shakespeare. Okay, so I might have bought "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare", but that doesn't mean I randomly start quoting the sayings of this 16th century poet. It's just that the quote seemed appropriate for this blog. You'll soon find out why.

When you're watching American series such as The OC, One Tree Hill or even Seventh Heaven you'll always find a couple ready to be torn apart by someone else. One way or another, there's always somebody lurking in the shadows, craving what the other one's got, waiting to make their move. Ryan had to choose between Marissa and Teresa. Lucas struggled to keep his emotions for Peyton bottled up while he was with Brooke and the kids of Reverend Camden also weren't exactly the perfect monogamous role models.

I've often wondered how accurate these shows were, because if they were, that would mean that fidelity isn't high on anyone's Ladder of Virtues across the Atlantic. Still, the number of shows playing with the whole love triangle storyline are far too numerous to be just the fluke of one production house. Do our overseas neighbours have it right? Is there no such thing as fidelity anymore and are we all just secretly craving another person's conquest? And if so, is all still fair in love and war?

Marriage and love consequentially (?), are said to have been on the decline for quite some time. Feminists like to pinpoint this occassion with the coming of the Pill, said to have been the cause of the sexual revolution -and as an added bonus, it plummeted the stocks of marriage around the world. People weren't looking for commitment anymore, they only wanted instant gratification. No more waiting for the ring, followed by the "Happily Ever After" in the suburbs. The war was over, the battles had been fought, now it was time to enjoy what -more precisely, who- was left. Little did they know that the worst battles were yet to be fought, behind closed doors and tinted windows.

For some time now, I have found myself drawn towards an "unavailable". Yet, the feelings are mutual. Sure, there's always been something in the air, but sufficed to say, it never crossed over to the physical plain. Generally speaking, when a girl says she has a BF, you back off. It's the respectful thing to do. But what if the lines between faithfulness and "What he doesn't know, won't hurt him" start to fade?

Attraction is a funny thing. Most of the time, you can't explain it. It just is. It makes you wonder how something that is so wrong, can feel so right? Yet, there is definitely some attraction in the air. And lately this attraction has become borderline infatuation.

What started out as innocent -although, are they ever really?- text messages, slowly evolved into something more. However, we still remained aware of the boundaries that kept us apart. On her side, there was the matter of the BF. On my side, there was the matter of common decency and moral restraint. But seriously, Lust kicks Moral's ass each and every time. So I was fighting a losing battle. And in time, I started to realize this. The line was becoming increasingly blurry. I can't tell exactly when we finally shoved the whole friendship thing aside and became something more, but it had happened and once the shift was made, there was no turning back.

For now, our text messages try to satisfy our ever-increasing appetite, but it won't be long before the great physical divide is finally crossed. And when that time comes, I don't know what will happen. I don't know what we'll be and what will be left. Could Shakespeare have got it right and do fire and powder really consume each other until there is nothing left? But then again, they say that out of the ashes something new blossoms, so where does that leave us?

I can't believe that after all those years of resenting Americans for their promiscuous behaviour, I have finally become one of them. I have succombed to my inner urges and allowed myself to become entangled in a love triangle. I always knew marriage was dead, but I never could have predicted this new position I find myself in. In my head, there are a million voices all screaming at me at once, telling me to end this before someone gets hurt or caught. And I've got millions of reasons why I shouldn't continue this "affair", but how can something that feels so right, be so wrong?

Sure, you can slap morals and resentments in my face, but at the end of the day, all that remains are the two of us. Where we'll take this, I can't say, but for now, I'm just going to enjoy the ride. Life has seldom been good to me in so many ways, I just learn to take my pleasures where I can get them. And if it should mean my demise, I can only hope I'll be able to pick myself up again in the same way that I did all those times before.